Brando's Badfinger Newsstand

Wish You Were Here Wish You Were Here
Warner Brothers BS 2827

by Robot A. Hull
Cream Magazine , February 1975, pg 67

Badfinger is imitation Raspberries. and Raspberries is 'imitation Goofy Grape fruit drink, which is imitation Kool-Aid, and IMITATIONS ARE BETTER THAN THE REAL STUFF'. True. true, when No Dice came out with them perfected Rubber Soul and Abbey Road Beatle formulaic pinnacles, it stood the world on its nose, and Badfinger was gonna be the next Beatles. That all finally got eclipsed by the faggots, and no more of them Beatle wiseguys like Hamlet, Gluesniffers Anonymous, Gello. and Electric Indian.

Lately, tho, them "Bingo with Ringo" chants been knocking down the walls of China even and so the band called Badfinger here to having the distinctive honor of being better Beatle imitators than the Beatle boobs themselves decides to force feed us with another masterpizza, and, chimps, no Monkees coulda done better. 'Know One Knows" has the band on all fours grabbing a Rebuttes trick and actually speaking Spanish over the bubblegum marshmellow International melodic structure of the tune itself (quite breathtaking like on the Four Seasons Call It a Nite where Frankie Valli sends his mommy a love letter in Italian while the other guys eat cheese and salami on rye). "Just a Chance" rips the album wide open with one gigantic sneeze like happens only once is a lifetime. More, more, more! Side two goes for two songs that are medleys which actually work (it's a first!), Even all the songs that sound like folk piss actually are loaded with production, soap lather, foam from a Tide wash, etc. Lotsa extra goodies that combine to make this album one worth filing.

Cept it's got be pushed. They're pushing albums like crazy on teevee these days (don't need promo men no more). Even the fu**ing Platters who will have their own show this year right opposite That's My Mamma. Everybody getting on the tube, but with ad campaigns that are worse than promo buttons. So we got Badfinger on TV to push this really exciting album, and they be imitators of previous formulas so that we give em GREAT ALL-TIME COMMERCIALS to use to plug their record. This includes that one where the black Satan turd throws the water from Kimbies onto poor unsuspecting house-maids, yeah, and where the girl gets her teeth stained red, and where Tom T. Hall picks ticks out this dog's ear and all the auto accident ads, and them nasal drip plops where the green snot is graphically depicted on the screen. All blue ribbon winners, true highlights of a medium that continues to give ya a headache with Brady Bunch re-runs and a new season that's got everybody re-watching Star Trek for the umpteenth time, and as one industry reflects another, this new record by Badfinger ain't half so bad when considered in that light.

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